OFF-BRAND MASCOT FROM HELL

Off-Brand Mascot From Hell didn't come from any recognized brand, and honestly that's the scariest thing about him. He shows up in a suit the wrong color in all the wrong places, with a smile that curves in directions smiles aren't supposed to go. His rubber-limb punches don't follow the laws of physics, and bounce attacks are both comical and deeply menacing. Confetti slap combos leave psychological damage longer than the bruises. And the hugs. God, the hugs. He fights like an abandoned birthday party had a nightmare about you specifically.